Sunday, April 4, 2010

Feeling GREAT (for an hour or two)

Hmmm … something seems to be changing. Over the last two weeks I have noticed that I have felt somewhat ‘better’. Actually I’m not even sure it’s better, just different. I seem to have a period every afternoon when I feel really rotten but mid morning to mid afternoon is pretty damn good. Early morning and night time are just average crappiness. But there does seem to be this pattern now, which wasn’t there before. The only thing that I am doing differently is that I started my graded exercise program. It’s very minimal, basically I walk for 3 minutes a day blah blah blah, so I doubt that it’s what has caused the change. Other than that it could be that I am mostly sleeping better. I am taking a small dose of Endep each night and it has started working for me, I am now sleeping much much better most nights. Oh the other thing I have noticed is I now get a headache everyday, which is also new (but not exciting hahaha). The other thing I am wondering about it the influence my mood may be having on my physical symptoms. I find that because I get bored easily and because I have a creative mind, I am starting to make myself work on some new projects. Writing and recording new music, experimenting with some photowork inside my flat and also working on a small video project. Anyway, these things have me excited and I wonder if those happy hormones are making a difference to the physical nasties?? Hmmmm, maybe the excitement is what makes the morning/early afternoon so good, but then I crash in the later afternoon, which sucks because there is nothing worse than not feeling well enough to watch The Bold and the Beautiful (on at 4.30pm daily). Say what you will about trashy daytime TV but tuning in to see if Donna gets locked in the steamroom by Pam and is left to die is what keeps me going!! I don’t think there is much more I can say after that ... LOL

Oh, P.S. yes that is a VERY scary pic of me .... but don't my new teeth look FAAABULOUS!


  1. Good news then on the whole. Great to hear. Do those new knashers work extra well on chocolate since it's Easter ??

    I think we all have phases actually and they come and go according to the physical nasties and, as you say, any happier hormones that may be coursing through the veins. In any case it's definitely a good idea to keep up the creativity, excitement and joie de vivre !

  2. Changes for the better. Yay! As for what caused it, well, probably all of the above. Plus I think you maybe haven't been trying to push beyond what you should so much?

    I also find that the Random Factor influences is always in play. Unrelated to anything I've done or thought or even the weather.

    But it's always great to celebrate the improved periods. Especially the ones on a daily cycle. That's when I get things done.

    So, once again... Yay!!!

  3. This sounds great! If you have a morning rest for half an hour and an afternoon rest you might be able to iron out the peaks and troughs a bit. Love the gnashers.

  4. Them teeths are perty! Enjoy those two glorious hours a day, that's what I do. It definitely sounds like an improvement!

    Jo, you have a lot of really good advice in your comments. Thanks for sharing!


  5. Wooo! Great news. I've noticed if I get up a little earlier in the morning (9 instead of 11am), I have a little more energy! Perhaps the graded exercise is helping you?

    Loving the teeth btw, hope they were very helpful over Easter.

  6. haha yes Forgetful Girl, the teeth were useful over Easter, I chewed the shirt right off of a hunky tradesman who accidentally turned up on my doorstep! hahaha ... well no actually I just politely said 'I think you have the wrong house' ... but OMG!!!

  7. That's how my recovery began. I had a horrible slump at 4pm and therefore did nothing. however I then realised that I could do things at other times of the day with MUCH less fallout and so I started. I too was completely 100% bedridden, carried around and to the toilet etc so recovery can happen. I still sometimes get a bit sleepy at 4pm tho!


  8. PS. I just tried to comment on your post about recovery but it wouldn't let me! I don't miss blogger haha!

    I am recovered. I am not fully recovered, my remaining symptoms being that i sleep for ten hours every single night and if I don't I feel like shit, and that I still get knocked about by viruses. Other than that i don't have any symptoms of ME (despite the latest morose blog post), and I work a 35 hour week. It can happen, and I was completely bedridden as the 2008 years of my blog attest!


  9. wow!! That is FANTASTIC to hear billygean!!! Thanks for say hello and spreading positive thoughts hehe.

  10. Love the pic! It made me smile - yes. it is sort of a scary looking happy...

    I've been feeling better recently, too. My doctor and I both think it's simply the end of the worst virus season in decades. I was in a bad relapse for 6 months, starting in mid-September - coincidentally when my kids went back to school and all the viruses started. I've heard from 3 different doctors that this winter was the worst one for infections they'd ever seen. I know from past experience that, although I rarely catch viruses, being exposed to them caused my immune system to rev up even further, making me crash.

    So, that's my theory! Though I think there's definitely something to be said for those happy hormones!! Whatever it is, I hope it continues for you...


  11. That's fantastic! Cherish those moments of 'betterness'. It may only be 3 minutes but you'd be surprised what a difference that little bit of graded exercise can make. As much as I hate to admit it, I notice even if I miss it for a day and it really does make me feel better. And yes, positivity, an active mind, feeling worthwhile and creatively involved have all been big 'betterness makers' for me when I was at my lowest. I was at the point of suicide with the despair of my last flare when I was totally dependent until I happened to stumble into a room with a piano. That piano probably quite literally saved my life as I was able to channel my frustrations and boredom into something beautiful.
    And oh yes, sleep! Can't beat it as a tonic!

    One thing I've learned over the years is start to recognise these patterns of slumps and betterness times, and to schedule around them. I know I'm shit until about 11am every day, and again from about 4pm-9pm, so I factor that in and plan around it. Schedule energy so you can use it when you have it and preserve it when you don't.
    Hope this continues for you xox

  12. Just commented elsewhere, but I can't miss an opportunity to offer suggestions hehe. Well, things I *think* might help, but who knows. How is the exercise therapy going?

    Anyway, I started "graded exercise therapy" on my own again a few weeks ago (had done them almost a year ago also with some positive results). I don't really follow a specific protocol, I just do whatever I think feels right. I tried doing some very basic "yoga-esque" type of exercise, but I realized that most of those tired the crap out of me because they require strength. But what really worked wonders (gradual wonders, mind you) is starting with very light, very basic slow stretching while lying down. Even just 3 min a day. Sometimes it requires a little push to get through them because it feels extra tiring in the moment, but doing them a couple of days a week even to start really helped me. It helped me feel less "congealed" if that makes sense and I feel like it helps move blood/oxygen through my poor achey muscles.

    Anyway, if you decide to try it, start slow and follow what feels right. For me, it required pushing myself a little bit beyond my comfort zone, but well worth it I believe :) Let me know how it goes if you try it!!